


We can't go back anymore

by Carsonairy



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses, Given (Anime)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Attempted Sexual Assault, Band Fic, Bassist Claude, Break Up, Dialogue Heavy, Drummer Dimitri, Implied Sexual Content, Love Confessions, M/M, Unrequited Love, Violinist Byleth, Vocalist & Guitarist Ashe, giving Byleth a personality, guitarist felix
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-13
Updated: 2021-02-13
Packaged: 2021-03-16 11:21:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,286
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29331492
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Carsonairy/pseuds/Carsonairy
Summary: Dimitri couldn't let go of Byleth, little does he know, a certain of his bandmate has feelings.Also, Ashe needs inspiration.Basically a Given movie AU
Relationships: Ashe Duran | Ashe Ubert/Felix Hugo Fraldarius, Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd/Claude von Riegan, Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd/My Unit | Byleth
Kudos: 6





	We can't go back anymore

**Author's Note:**

> You don't have to previously watch both the anime and movie to read this, but it's recommended if you would :] (There won't be any major anime spoilers, but hinted flashbacks)
> 
> Title is from Bokura Dake no Shudaika - Centimillimental Eng Translated

It was a sunny day as Ashe was going to Dimitri's place. Earphones on, listening to Cavetown as he walks along the path. He takes a sudden stop as he sees a familiar figure inside a black sunroof car. " _Oh, Dimitri!"_ Ashe thought...

" _With a girl???_ " The unknown couple kissed as Ashe goes in shock, taking his earphones off to examine the situation. Dimitri gets out of the car noticing him.

"She paid you... money?" he looks at the cash on Dimitri's hand, more confused than ever. "Wait, n- no. Don't get the wrong idea. It's just her thing."

_"He used to be pretty wild," said Claude. "but I think he's calmed down quite a bit now."_

Ashe remembered that day in the coffee shop, he was curious to know more about his older band members so he went to Claude. Dimitri had something with always going around with girls.

"It's not that you've actually calmed down. You just don't do this stuff in front of Claude, right?" Dimitri just smiled at him. Today was unusual as he wanted to take Ashe to an orchestral concert. So, they kept walking along to the area.

"I knew you wanted to go all-out to learn more about music, but I didn't think you'd actually come to this concert with me." Dimitri said as they took their seats.

Everything goes dark and Ashe looks up from the brochure to see musicians come by to the lightened stage, "Thank you so much for the ticket."

"No worries, I didn't pay for them, anyway." he gets confused. "Apparently, he's taken a liking of you." Dimitri points to the violinist standing in the center. Ashe is pretty sure he has seen him before.

"Damn it... I told him to brush his hair." Dimitri sighs to himself. The musicians took a deep breath and started playing what seems to be Finale: Allegro Vivacissimo. The music slowly gets intense. "Uhm, so why is the guy with the violin the only one standing?" Ashe ponders.

"That's how violin concertos work." The blue-haired on stage starts doing his violin solo, leaving Ashe surprised. Dimitri was swayed by the sound.

 _Dimitri was confident about what he wanted to do in music, he had aspiration. But one day, he heard a violin on his way to class._ _Dimitri makes a stop to look over to the small music room._

_He was rather intrigued by the mysterious boy's aggressive talent._

_It was drowning, he hated him, he felt lost to the eyes of Byleth._

The music comes to an end and everyone starts clapping, "Dimitri, I... I want to write songs."

* * *

A week later, the entire band meets up in the local fast-food place. "We made it through the second screening!" Claude looks at his phone emails. "Second? Screening for what?" Felix didn't know what he meant. "Our entry for CAC!"

"Huh?!" Felix stands up in surprise, "CAC? What is that?" still being new to music, Ashe asked.

”Countdown-Fes amateur Contest!" he never wanted to slap his boyfriend so badly. Felix further explained, it's apparently a super rock festival held at the end of the year. There's a slot where amateurs get to play with the pros and the biggest bands Fódlan. They have never seen the usual-grumpy boy so hyped and talkative.

"When did we apply for that?"

Felix recalls from that time they were in that all-you-can-eat restaurant, "Uh, we talked about entering when we decided our band name, remember?! Wait, when did we even get through the first one?"

"I _definitely_ told you they cleared our application." Claude argues, "We have a third one, it's the last. People will be judging our performance live."

Ashe went starry-eyed and his boyfriend starts making remarks. "How are you so excited? Do you know how much big of a deal this is?"

"Calm down, Felix." Dimitri reassures Felix and Claude was concerned, "How are we gonna do this? With the only song we have?"

"It makes me happy seeing all the comments, what about you guys?" Ashe asked. "Well.." "It makes me ecstatic." "Same."

"That's good, I really want to do this." Ashe tightens his grip on the burger he was eating. Everyone was motivated.

It turned to night and the young couple decided to walk home together. "Ashe, you said you wanted to write songs, right?"

"Yeah. Our first song gave me some personal closure, basically. So for our next one, I..." They both stop walking and Ashe sighs. "Seriously, what?! Don't just give up in the middle of your thought!"

"I do have something I want to say..." "Just say it, then!" He takes another long pause until, "Another time." Ashe starts walking again. "What?"

The gray-haired realized 2 things looking at the performance. First, emotions can resonate through music. Second, he thinks that Dimitri feels the same as him.

* * *

By midnight, Byleth came home from the concert. "I'm back in Fòdlan for the first time in ages, and you're in bed before me? Seriously?" Dimitri doesn't respond.

"Hey, so how was the concerto?" Still silent. "It was probably so good, it made you hard." An arm grabbed him onto the bed and suddenly Dimitri was on top of him. "Dimi-" they were pulled to a long hard kiss until he pulled off. "What? Are we doing this today? That's rare. You never get tired of this, do you, Dimitri?"

 _"Pretty sure Dimitri is also in love with someone he can't replace..." Ashe thought._ "and _it's_ **unrequited.** "

The bright sun shines into Dimitri's eyes as he hears someone calling for him and the familiar sound of a doorbell. "Dimi!" They have difficulties when it comes to waking up. "Yeah... just one more minute." He heard Byleth say something about their guest leaving before he could answer the door.

Byleth took it upon himself and opened the door, "Who is it?" His eyes go wide open as he sees Ashe. "Ah! You're the vocalist kid!"

Dimitri finally wakes up hearing the sounds of a broken guitar, looking at his left to see the 2 being entertained. He yawned, "What am I looking at right now?" Byleth hushed him. Ashe starts strumming something, "Yeah, that sucked."

The 2 band members looked at Byleth as if he was a demonic dragon. "So, the 6-bar progression after the hook, the lala lala lala part... You brought down the intensity 'cause you didn't know It's supposed to sound different, isn't it? Those are the emotions you wanted to sing?." Dimitri glares at him, he acts like a teacher when there's an opportunity to.

"Hey Ashe, is that for our new song?" Dimitri asked and he nodded, "That's all I have though, pretty much." The older man stood up and walked away, "Alright, I have plans with Claude. Keep Byleth company for me."

* * *

They were in a van together and Dimitri was driving. He was explaining Claude what happened back at his home, "Huh? Are you sure it was okay to just leave him there?" Claude was worried, he only answered in 'Yeah' or 'Uhuh's

"W-wait, you have a roommate?!"

"I do" He changed the subject before reality could hit him, "But, Ashe has gotten so much better, it's scary. Everything he bottled up inside is finally free." Claude was still shocked by the sound of him having a roommate. Dimitri keeps rambling about Ashe, "And Felix, he's taking remedial classes for 2 classes, right?" In Ashe and Felix's school, being average means super smart.

It wasn't a case for the blonde, Felix to him is a borderline genius. Assured he knows what he's doing, hopefully.

"So, I know this might not be the best way to put it, but you're different, Dima. You can play the violin, guitar and bass. Like, you're a jack-of-all-trade but, a master at none. Meanwhile, I'm just the dictionary definition of mediocrity. It's hard for you though, is it?"

"You're a peacemaker," Claude raises an eyebrow. "That's why everyone loves you. Just saying you're more popular than you think."

"I don't think that way really!"

* * *

Meanwhile, Ashe was still at his house, "Uhm, By... leth, are you and Dimitri..."

"Oh, sleeping together? We're not exactly together anymore." The 2 met in high school. Being his first love, it was super fun to him. Dimitri kept spoiling him and Byleth became more cowardly. As they graduated and Byleth got his violinist career he realized... They were suffocating each other the entire time.

_He was preparing to get on stage, "Dimitri, let's end this." looking straight at each other in the eyes. His reaction was priceless._

"With him around, I don't have freedom on my music. My entire existence cause him suffering as well." Byleth explains as he changes to his casual wear. "I think you know the rest. We spent 2 years being desperate but, we somehow keep crawling back to each other."

"W- why are you telling me all this?" Ashe felt like he went on a breach of privacy, someone is telling him his entire love life. Byleth giggled, "Well, I don't have any friends. Maybe, I just wanted someone to understand. Even just a little bit."

"I'm not very expressive, so I'm pretty sure Dimitri despises me and hates my guts. I love him to death, I might be the one who dumped him but I haven't been able to let go." he grabs his violin bag and starts to leave, "I've been trying to get rid of him but, it never worked out... All this time."

"I'm just gonna go out now. This place is soundproof, make yourself at home. Go use it for your song if you liked that story." Byleth closes the door.

Right around the time they both started living together, Dimitri tried giving him his first gift. For a mug, he just... hated it. He knocked it out of his hand. Byleth knew he should've said he was happy with it. He wanted to stay by his side. Nothing can surpass his love for music, even his own lover.

* * *

Dimitri was somewhere else.

 **Byleth:** im bringing home my new boyfriend tonight

 **Byleth** : u might have to stay somewhere else for now

He gets a call and he picks up, "What is it, Claude?"

"What do you mean? We talked about doing a get-together with the other bands. W- wait, what do you mean you're not coming?"

"I'm in a bad mood right now."

"Bu-" he hears a girl moan through his phone, "Bye." the call ends and Claude freezes at the thought of Dimitri being with a girl and slowly drops to the floor. He knew they were definitely doing it. Before any panic attack happens, he went back to the restaurant and acted like everything was okay. "Did something happen?"

Claude looks at his purple-haired friend and sits back on the chair. "Dimitri seems to be really irritable these past few days." he tried doing a fake laugh. "So that's why you look tired? Seriously, get over him already!"

"I know, Lorenz." He lights up a cigarette. "Hey, why not play bass for another band for a change of pace? A support bassist." Claude was lightened by the idea, "For what? Your band?"

"Nope, your ex-girlfriend's actually..."

"My... Uhm, No!" Claude shouts straight at Lorenz's face. "I figured you'd be okay..." "Okay? Seriously?"

He kept complaining, "But! When you think about our relationship, wouldn't this be a courting problem?!"

"No, well she asked me for help..." Lorenz sighed. "This seems precisely like having been kicked out for dating within the band! Isn't this the same as adding fuel to the fire?" He thought of his band members, "Especially, when my band is in a delicate situation, right now?"

"That's... I suppose so. But, more importantly, are _you_ okay? You seemed stressed lately." Claude wanted to swallow all his food so bad and leave the place. "Are you actually enjoying music lately?"

"Yeah. Of course I... am..." Lorenz knew something wasn't right with the tone of his voice and he's right, Claude's _suffering_.

* * *

The next day, Ashe and Felix were in the band's studio to work on their new song. "Working hard? Wait, it's just you two" The Almyran man didn't forget to join practice today, luckily. "Where's Dimitri?"

"He said he couldn't make it because of something at school." said Ashe, those words got on Claude's nerves. By instinct, he's sure that their drummer lied, especially from what happened yesterday. "Forget about the boar, want to take the song a listen?" Felix asked, snapping him from his own world. "Sure." He nodded.

"1, 2, 3, 4." Ashe starts playing the same tune he played in Byleth's house. Dimitri was right, the young boy did make progress.

"What's for dinner tonight? Udon or pasta~"

Claude got confused, "Yeah, does aren't the final lyrics yet." Felix reassured. _"Oh, thank god!"_ he sighed in relief. The band continued brainstorming.

"We could use a drum filler here, we wanted to discuss this with you, Claude." he was surprised by Ashe's sudden question, he's really beginning to understand how music works. When did he learn so much about it anyway?

"We don't have lyrics yet, written up pretty much until the first hook." Felix is more focused and calm than ever. They didn't even need to add lyrics to make Claude realize their current progress. It sounds like a tune to a love song. Ashe is a genius, you can feel the presence of many future musical pieces behind him. He's actually listened to the multiple CDs and vinyls that they gave him one time. Claude feels so much different from the lovebirds, something about the feeling of alienation. He can't even figure out who he is himself.

"So let's hold off on during live performances." Felix was talking. It looks like Claude got lost in his thoughts so he could only reply, "Huh? Yeah, sure..."

"Thanks, Claude." He was happy for the gray-haired boy.

* * *

Claude was trying to sleep, but a phone notification widens his eyes.

 **Mitri:** Are you still up?

 **Claude:** im awake

 **Mitri:** I'm right in front of your place.

 **Mitri:** Can I stay over?

That message got him right in shock and he went out of his bed running out to his door. As he opens, he sees Dimitri sitting on the apartment stairs. Claude made the smallest worried noise that Dimitri notice him right away. "Hey."

Claude notices the marks on the bottom of his right eye. "What happened to your face?"

They were back inside Claude's apartment sitting on the couch and Dimitri tried to explain the entire situation, "Yeah, so I... sorta got into it with my roommate."

"'Got into it'?! You had a fist fight?"

"So I've been spending the night at random places to get by." he didn't think Dimitri would actually take his high school friend's advice seriously, "You mean you haven't been at home at all?!"

"I mean, it hasn't been _that_ long." still, it was worrying to him. _"He's like the old Dimitri."_ Claude thought. "How was the studio session today?" There he is, changing the subject again. "Oh, I listened to the new song. They want to hold off on live performances for a while to focus on songwriting."

"Guess we'll have to hit the studio as much as possible, then. You have time for most of the summer don't you?" Claude didn't know what to reply and fidgets on the soda can Dimitri offered. "You have other plans?"

"N- no, I wouldn't actually call them plans..." Dimitri looked at him dead in the eyes. "Are you hiding something from me?"

"Huh?" was the only thing Claude could deliver. Dimitri aggressively puts his soda can down, "What are you hiding?" He slowly gets closer to Claude and he gets scared. "Uh, what's with you? Why are you in such a bad mood?" 

"There has to be something" It's starting to get on his nerves. "I mean... Sort of..." He stuttered. "I don't wanna hear that from you." Recalling that time in the restaurant. Dimitri grabs his arm, "Hey, that hurts!"

"Just tell me!" Claude pushes away from his grip. "My ex-girlfriend asked if I'd fill in as a support bassist for a while! This doesn't even concern you!" Claude rethinks what he just said and looks back up at Dimitri. "So... Are you going? To your ex-girlfriend?" His tone felt deeper, it was creeping him.

"This is getting to hard, so you're gonna abandon your current band." Dimitri assumed. "That's not true... I never said anything like-" He grabs Claude's shirt, bringing closer to him. His shaking hands let go of his half-empty soda can and it spills on the floor. 

"You.." Dimitri shouted. Pushing Claude down back to the couch, making him on top of him. "You're in love with me, but you're gonna run away?" Claude was getting flustered for the wrong reasons. "W- what are you talking about? Wait, why are you..."

"Why? Who cares anymore." His voice started to get seductive. Dimitri pulls himself closer to Claude's face, "Claude... you keep mentioning an ex-girlfriend? but are you actually able to sleep with any girls when you're like this?" He softly plays with his little braid. " _Screw you! You can't be serious! I was sleeping with them just fine before I met you!_ " He wanted to push Dimitri away but, he couldn't.

Before Dimitri could kiss him, Claude felt something warm crawling into his boxers and grabs his face. "Wait..." He badly wanted to get out of this situation so bad but he could only turn his head away. "Dimitri... Dimi-" Dimitri backs away, touching Claude's legs wide open, "No, wait, wait. Stop! You-" He continued, opening his own shirt.

Dimitri knew he was taking all of his frustration onto Claude. Even after breaking up with Byleth, they still would clash regularly. As if he's using those opportunities to finally let him go for good. Like, he's trying to tell him he doesn't need his love and force Dimitri out of his world.

 _"W_ _hy? If you don't want me anymore, then why do you still accept my attachment to you?_ _"_

_"If you feel so sorry for me and my feelings, why are you trying to throw me away?"_

_Dimitri wants to hold him, he wants to run away, he wants to give up. Yet, he can't let go, he wants to touch him. And it hurts so much._

"Dimitri... What is it? Please stop..." he started crying. Claude's shaking hands reach for his. "Don't make that face... Please don't look so hurt... What is it? Tell me please." His other hand goes for Dimitri's face. "I'll do anything for you.

Dimitri lets go, "Telling you won't solve anything. I'm sorry." He looked down at his chest. " _Why couldn't it just be you?_ "

An hour later, Claude was still laying down on the couch with Dimitri's shirt on and he was sitting on the floor. Dimitri broke the dead silence, "I'm really sorry. This was completely my fault."

"That's not what I wanted to apologize for. I told you I'd do anything. In the end, it was basically consensual." Claude continued, "You can spend the night tonight."

"What?" Dimitri turned to look at Claude. "I'll just go to a friend's place. Just leave in the morning." He gets up and grabs his tote bag. "You can use whatever I have here. Don't worry about locking up when you leave."

"Clau-" 

"I'll hold off on filling in as bass." Reassuring Dimitri. "So... just be gone in the morning."

As he walked off the building, he thought about what Dimitri said. He started crying again.

* * *

"Shit!" Dimitri smacked on the glass table, " _I really too much on Claude... How lame can I be? I have nowhere to go._ " he thought to himself.

Dimitri didn't have a home ever since his parents separated during his last year of high school and right when he was trying to figure out what to do...

_"Why don't you come to my place then?" Byleth offered._

Ever since that day in the music room, he had a place to call home that barely had any sunlight. 

Whenever he fought with Byleth, he did whatever it took to find another place to stay. Dimitri thought he was pitiful and pathetic just like what Felix would call him, a _boar_. He did things he can't even laugh about. He just didn't want Claude to find out about it.

* * *

Lorenz was walking to his apartment when he sees someone on his balcony, Claude was looking at him. " _Oh god, something happened._ " he felt disappointed, he pulled out his phone and looked at his text messages.

 **Dimitri:** Thanks.

_**New Messages** _

**Dimitri:** Hey.

 **Dimitri:** Sorry, is Claude at your place?

" _Yeah, something definitely happened!_ " Lorenz thought to himself.

They were both in his place and offered Claude tea. "What the hell happened to you? Those dark circles are intense!"

"This barley tea is delicious." he said in a tired tone. "Seriously, what's going on? It's painfully obvious something happened." He couldn't get him to talk about it, "Please, may I have some more?" "Uh, are you even listening to me?"

"Lorenz," He finally caught his attention. "You are good at hair, right?"

* * *

 **Ashe:** so sorry, dimitri

 **Ashe:** but is claude around you rn?

 **Dimitri:** He's not.

It was past morning and he hasn't come home yet. Dimitri ended up waiting because he didn't want to awkwardly bump into Claude but he started thinking, " _Should I go look for him? Wait, is he okay?_ " He felt like filling in a missing person's report. He heard a door opening.

"Claude-" He looked different, his little braid was gone and most of his hair was slicked back. "Oh, you're still here. Sorry, but as you can see, I'm pretty exhausted since you rejected me. Could you just go home?" Claude said.

"H- hang on a sec-" He slapped Dimitri's arm. "Look, I'm actually mad here."

"Sorr-"

"I'm saying it pissed me off even more when you apologized to me!" He shouted straight at his face. "Just go home. For both of our sakes." Claude started to walk away, "I don't have anywhere I can go."

Claude stopped and looked back at him, "Huh?"

"I seriously don't have anywhere else I can go right now. I have been staying a few days here and there... But I'd be pushing my luck if I stayed longer. Could I stay here for a while-"

"Hell no!" Claude replied.

"Right. I'll do all the housework... And I'll sleep anywhere. Even the floor."

"What?" He was confused. "I promise I won't try anything again. I was at my limit yesterday... and I went too far. I'm sorry. Please help me."

Claude decided to be honest, "I would've totally abandoned you if we weren't in the same band."

* * *

They decided to go to the studio together and the couple arrived last. "Huh?"

"Hey. Good morning." Claude said with a bright smile."What happened to your hair?!" Felix was concerned. "it's been too hot, so I cut it." He lied.

With the band already having the song's instrumental set, they decided to practice together. Felix noticed something and got frustrated, "Hey, wait, stop!" The rest of the band stopped playing their instruments in sync. "We're totally off today. What the hell? Why are you such in a bad mood, boar?"

Dimitri jumped, " _Oh, dear._ " Claude looked at Felix with another smile, "Sorry, I'm just a bit off today. But... I'll be fine."

* * *

It was still the afternoon and Claude left band practice early, so Dimitri tried to catch on. "Hey! Claude! Hey!"

"Stop following me."

" _I'm so pathetic. Everyone looks like they're sparkling. I'm so lame. It hurts._ " Claude thought. "Claude! Hey!" Dimitri was still trying to get his attention to no avail.

It didn't matter if it's music or anything else. Claude couldn't figure out why he was so desperate. "Damn it, wait!" Dimitri catches his arm. "Am I even necessary?!" Claude shouted.

"I'm not a genius like everyone else. And I was way off playing with you guys today!" Claude felt pathetic, he wants to disappear.

"What? Because you were looking down the whole time you were playing. Of course you'd be off if you didn't look up. You don't have to look in front of you, but at least look at me. Being in a band is different than being a solo artist. A band would never work without 4 geniuses. Someone has to be there to support them, and we need you. I'm pretty sure I tell you that all the time." Dimitri paused. "Any objections?"

Claude was surprised at his words, "No... Who do you think you're talking to?" He started walking away again and Dimitri caught on.

"What do you want for dinner today? I'll make you something if you're feeling down." Dimitri changed the subject. "I'm a freeloader after all."

"You've got this mooching lifestyle down." Claude admitted. "You're right."

* * *

That was the start of their new bizarre life together.

As the days went on as they lived together, Claude started to realize. Dimitri was far louder than he'd ever imagined, Claude would use earmuffs when he'd practice his instruments. He also made him food without ever asking to.

The band was taking a small break in the studio, "Our bass and drums are really in sync lately," Ashe remarked. "Oh, really?" Claude looked at him. "Did something happen?"

He feels like he's about to break a sweat, "No, not really."

It was evident to him that Dimitri could do anything. Claude thought that maybe he wasn't paying attention to him at all lately. It wasn't fair that he can't actually hate him.

* * *

Claude heard his doorbell and went to the front door, "Hey," He waved his hand. "Lorenz?"

"Here you go, some meats from the supermarket." He gave him a plastic bag of the bunch. "Oh, thank you."

"I didn't hear from you after that, so I'm here to check on you." Recalling that day he stayed overnight at his place. "Ah...Th- that is, uhh... He..." Claude tried explaining everything that had happen the past few days. "You're living with Dimitri now?!"

"Shh!!" Claude blocked the entrance. Lorenz tried pushing him away from the door, shouting at each other. He got in the way of his head, and examined the living room. "Are you for real?! The place has completely transformed to Dimitri's nest! Just how crazy are you guys?!"

They heard him talking from the bathroom. "Huh? Did someone come over?"

"Lorenz is here!" Pushing Lorenz away from the apartment, resulting in him screaming. "But, you...! ugh." Lorenz gave up.

He actually has been aware Claude has fallen for Dimitri from the very beginning. What confirmed it was that day he came over.

_"I had a small fight with Dimitri." He sighed._

" _I see, he finally got his heart broken... huh._ " _Lorenz thought to himself, cutting the braid._

_Seeing Claude's eyes bloodshot and swollen from crying, he just knew. He didn't give Lorenz any details and didn't really think about asking either. It was clear and that made him want to cut off his feelings that have pilled up for years._

" _Yet why are you keeping him with you?!_ " Lorenz facepalmed. "Well... I really am sorry for not contacting you. " Claude apologized.

"The matter of playing support, I heard you've declined?" He asked. "Ah.. Well, rather than decline. I put it on hold. Although, I was told I could drop off anytime, apparently..."

"Jeez... Isn't it fine to just go there?!" Lorenz pointed at him. "Why are you trying to stand up for that sewer rat?!" He realized he was shouting, they both sat down on the apartment stairs to calm down.

"Claude, you really hate Dimitri don't you?"

"It isn't like I'm defending him or anything. But things weren't going too well for me until recently. I felt like I was using another band to run away and I couldn't really raise the topic with the two young ones on my band... So I figured maybe I should try talking about it once with them as well. Thus, _on hold_."

"Did you have some kind of breakthrough?" Lorenz calmy asked. "Hmm, I guess so."

"Well, if you're alright, then I'm okay with it."

"Lorenz, you're so cool... Thanks."

* * *

He found Dimitri smoking a cigarette on the balcony one night, "Oh, right! Today's the fireworks festival." Claude walks outside to look at the busy view along. "This place is pretty high up, so you get a good view, even from far away." 

"Must be nice." Dimitri replied. He noticed the low tone on his voice, "You couldn't see them from your place?"

"Not at all." Dimitri looks back at the fireworks. "I mean, the place was half underground. I didn't know they did fireworks around this time for Bon. It's sorta freaking me out, actually."

"Didn't you ever go see fireworks with... them?" Claude didn't want to assume his ex-roommate's gender. "Nope. But these are prettier than I thought they'd be."

Dimitri pause, "We are pretty much done. More like I was a friend with benefits and a freeloader. We weren't technically dating. He dumped me a long time ago and I'm just left dangling."

"What the hell? You're totally in love with him, though." Claude was almost shocked. "I sure was. But now... it just hurts."

They went silent for a bit. "Hey, thanks for letting me stay here." Dimitri said.

"You're welcome."

* * *

"Great job today!" They shouted in unison. "We don't have the lyrics yet, but..." Felix said. "Yeah." Ashe knew what he was talking about, today's band session was seemingly successful.

Dimitri grabbed his phone, "I'll send the recording to you guys later. Make sure to check all your parts." Ashe and Felix replied in sync, "Yeah."

"Claude, you got any plans after this?" Claude turned to Dimitri, "Nope." He was still sitting on his drumset. "I'm gonna practice a bit more, wanna help?"

"Where'd this come from?" He noticed Dimitri was acting more enthusiastic than usual. "I'm just having a lot of fun."

As usual, Ashe and Felix walked home together. "I think we need a different approach." Felix said.

"Huh?"

"To the lyrics. You said you wanted to write a different kind of song." He recalled. "It's not like I don't have ideas at all. But when I feel like I almost got it, I keep feeling there's a piece missing."

"Then, why don't you go look for it? You're the type that gets inspiration from your own feelings or what's going on with the people around you."

* * *

The other 2 eventually tried going home as well, "Aw man... Yeah, the last train took off ages ago. It's such a waste to call a cab." Claude sighed. It was already way past midnight.

"And that's why we walk," Dimitri added. "Wait, you mean all the way to my apartment? Are you insane?"

"it would probably take us an hour." Claude was still concerned, "Are you nuts?" "No, really. An hour goes by fast."

"Seriously... You think like a 20-year-old, college student."

The sky was already bright. "Come on, stop that." Claude giggled, "How'd you even find that" He points at the little creature Dimitri was holding. "It was hanging off some grass. It's a dragonfly."

"Put the poor thing back" Claude demanded. "Aww." Dimitri looked down at it, "What are you, five?"

"Bugs are nice though."

"Well, I guess I used to catch them when I was a kid. Oniyama dragonflies and such." The boys took stopped walking when they saw something pass by. "Was that the first train?" Claude looked up.

"I believe so." He replied. "You idiot! This is all because you kept making detours!" The blonde had the biggest laugh Claude have heard in a long time.

The boys were still laughing out and about when they reached home."I'm so sweaty... I don't want to take another nap." Claude said. "I guess I'll at least take a shower." Dimitri gets up on the floor and gets to the bathroom. "Wow, what a good guy. I can't anymore." He quickly falls asleep.

* * *

"I'm home." Claude turns to his right as he hears the distinct noise of a violin. "Welcome back." Dimitri stops playing and notices Claude just staring, "What?"

"I was just thinking you play your violin more than I realized." Dimitri denied, "No, I don't practice near as much as someone who's hardcore."

"Really? Come to think of it, isn't there some famous musician from our school? He plays the violin... What was his name again?" He thinks for a second and Dimitri widens his eyes in fear. "Oh, Byleth Eisner."

A sudden crack of glass. Byleth couldn't focus on practicing, he couldn't breathe. "Um, I..." Byleth turned around to see who the familiar was. Oh, Ashe. There was a moment of silence before he started talking, "Ah... Jeez, you scared me."

"Oh, sorry... Your door was unlocked and I heard a loud noise." Byleth looked down on the glass cup he broke, "I thought Dimitri came home."

"wait, he's not here?" He turned back at Byleth with his straightest face, "Did you come here to see him?"

"I- I came here to see you, Prof- I mean Byleth!" Ashe tried to clear up the misunderstanding. "Me?"

* * *

The sounds of a weather report filled up the entire room "Morning." Claude said to Dimitri. "Morning..." He noticed that Dimitri has been spacing out lately.

Claude grabs his phone as he hears a notification coming out of his pocket.

**[Countdown-Fes A.C.] Final screening date and time**

_This is the CAC Admin,_

_This email is being sent to the representatives of the artists and groups t_ _hat passed the Countdown-Fes Amateur Contest and applied for_ _the third screening._

_Regarding the place and time for the third screening we discussed the other day, ..._

Felix got a text message and decided to run to Ashe's class once school was over, "Ashe! Apparently, the day they'll be judging us has been set. You think you can make it?"

"Yeah," Ashe replies as he grabs his backpack and walks over to his boyfriend. "the lyrics are done. We can do this." Felix widens his eyes hearing those words.

* * *

"Here's your voting slip." The kind light green-haired guy at the counter gave it to Ashe. Him and Felix were watching the first day for the third screening performances.

"I thought the judging for these performances was going to be like more of an audition." Ashe said. "Make sure you pay attention to everything. We're up tomorrow." His boyfriend reminded. "Yup."

They hear someone running to them. "I'm here!" Claude grabs the younger boy's shoulder in sweat. "Sorry, things got a bit chaotic when I left." He pants. "Is it about to start?"

"Yeah. Actually, where's the boar? Is he not gonna make it?" He asked. "Um... Yeah." Claude remembers trying to call him and heard his ringtone right behind him, he left his phone at home.

Dimitri was out in the rain, he has gone back to Byleth's house. The blue boy stops his violin playing as he hears faint footsteps behind him, "Dimitri."

Later, Dimitri made coffee for the both of them, "Here. Drink up."

"Sure." Byleth grabs the mug and Dimitri sits beside him on his bed. "So, hey. I'm moving out of this house. I came by to at least grab my long-sleeved clothes today." Byleth looks at him, "Oh. I see."

"Your room is way too messy." He commented. "Shut up." Byleth replied. "Want me to make you some food before I leave?"

"Who are you, my dad?" Byleth attempts to throw a pillow at him, but Dimitri grabs it. "Why? Why are you leaving now?"

Dimitri replies, "Music's actually been fun lately. I continued playing the violin so I could be your equal. I was convinced this was all I had and that you were all I had. But I was suffering that whole time When you said you wanted to break up with me, I wanted to run to someone else. When I started drums to spite you, I thought it was easier than doing classical music. My overall passion for music was pretty much gone."

He paused, "But... I want to leave this place. I want to leave here and play different music."

"No." Byleth grabs his sweater, "No!"

"Why?"

* * *

_**Missed call** _

_**Missed call** _

_**Missed call** _

_**Missed call** _

**Claude:** tell me when you get home

"Claude, Claude, Claude!" He looks away from his phone, "I said, do you want me to take your cup back?" Felix almost got furious. "Oh... Sorry. Thanks. " He gave him the cup and smiled as Felix walked away from the area. Ashe felt something was up, "Are you worried about Dimitri?"

"Y- yeah..." He replied. "You're living together now, right?" Claude jumped, "Huh? H- how much did you..." He wanted to throw a fit. "Not much, actually. But, it's hard watching you two sometimes. Because I mean... You're in love with Dimitri, right?"

"Have I always been that obvious?" Claude was getting anxious. "Well, sort of." He looked down to hide his flustered face, "I- I see. But it's okay. He's just staying over for a while. There's nothing going on between us. I crashed and burned, so I don't feel that way anymore."

"Really?" He looks back up at Ashe, he's never seen him look angry before, not even the smallest expression. "What?"

* * *

Claude was talking to himself walking back home, " _I mean, it's not like my feelings for him disappeared. But knowing that the one you like doesn't want anything from you... hurts."_

As he walks up the apartment stairs, he sees Dimitri looking through the mailbox. "Welcome back."

"What are you doing? Did you forget your keys?" Claude goes to unlock his apartment door. "No, I didn't. Also, Claude,"

"I'm home."

He didn't want to believe him, but he was still shocked, "Just so you know, I'm still mad at you, but let me calm you down over a smoke first." His lighter wasn't working. "I'm gonna run to the convenient store- Huh?" Claude felt a head on his shoulder, Don't go right now. Stay right here with me." Dimitri whispered.

* * *

Ashe and Felix were stargazing at a lake bridge nearby. "That was amazing." Ashe said. "Yeah, it was. They were all really good" The younger boy rested his head on the other's shoulder, "What? Wh- what is it?!" Ashe eventually let go and looked down. "What should I do? I'm starting to get nervous." He stuttered.

"What?! You actually get nervous?!" Felix gets shocked as if he didn't saw his boyfriend accidentally break his guitar right before their first performance, rushing to the store and back to get it fixed. 

"I start to wonder if I'll be able to sing this right or not... and I get scared. I want to get these feelings across. I want them to understand." He blushed, "I think I'm getting a little greedy."

"You've changed..." He looked at Felix. "At first, you were like, 'I can't join a band. I'm not thinking about anything. I can't express myself.' You were all hesitant." Felix looked back, he can't believe such a boy like Ashe is getting him all flustered. "Come here." He offered his arms to Ashe and he went all-in on the cuddle.

"Don't worry. You're way cooler than anyone else."

"Yes, Sir." Ashe said.

"Why the 'Sir'?" Felix giggled.

* * *

It was their turn, "Thanks. Could we get some bass next?" The announcer said. The band was checking if their instruments work before they could eventually perform their new song.

" _Why..._ "

_"You're going to abandon the violin just like that?!" Byleth screamed straight as his face._

_He lets go of the grip of his sweater, "Whatever. Get out."_

Dimitri's hand was shaking, he dropped his drumstick. He thought to himself, " _Maybe if I just gave up on music, everything in my life would work out._ " What even was the past few weeks? Dimitri wanted to cry his heart out. Though, he felt something hit his head.

"Come on now, look at that pathetic face." Claude gave him back the drumstick.

"Number 14, Lions Deer, you're up."

Ashe takes a deep breath. Before, it took everything he had to let his own word out. There was faint whispering in the audience.

"Come on, get it started."

"He's really building up for it."

His feelings for Felix. His love. Someone else's love. New music. Having others resonate with you. He takes one more deep breath.

_♪ Even if I don't sleep, dawn will break_   
_As I gaze over it ♪_

The stage lights turn on drastically. " _What was that just now?_ " Dimitri thoughts to himself as he plays the drums.

_♪ Over the unchanging white wall_   
_The sun shines and the clock ticks forward_   
_The seasons I had lived in with you_   
_Become distant to me little by little ♪_

" _This feeling... It's almost like..._ " He knows it isn't there, but he felt the familiar sounds of a violin.

Everyone in the crowd started to feel the music, bopping their heads one by one.

_♪ I wander into the night like this_   
_It's painful ♪_

" _Seriously?_ "

_♪ Even if I don't sleep, dawn will break_   
_As I gaze over it_   
_Things changing, things ending_   
_Things beginning_   
_I can live without you_   
_That's sad for me_   
_Look, dawn is nearly breaking_   
_Dawn is breaking ♪_

" _Wow, h_ _ow long has it been since I had goosebumps like this?_ " Dimitri couldn't recall when he started hating music. He loved it so much. But when he heard Byleth playing for the first time,

He had the same goosebumps he had the moment Ashe just started singing. " _Yeah... I love music._ "

Little does he know, someone else was in the crowd watching.

_♪ Blooming in Spring, withering in Autumn_   
_But over and over, if it sprouts again ♪_

When Byleth saw their performance last time, he had a feeling if Dimitri had some kind of trigger, he could really turn into something. " _I guess this is where I got to see the answer. "_

_♪ It's not "until here" but "from here"  
I understand ♪_

_"Oh, I see._ " Byleth smiled to himself. " _So, he's the one._ "

_♪ Even if I don't sleep, dawn will break_   
_The connected hands will eventually separate_   
_Even if I lose my way_   
_Cry and scream, eventually it'll stop_   
_I can live without you_   
_But even if I'm not loved, I miss you_   
_Look, dawn is nearly breaking_   
_Dawn is breaking ♪_

_Byleth took a sip of his coffee, "Over and over, I've thought about what I'd do if Dimitri never came back." He told Ashe. "No matter how many times I thought about it, I couldn't imagine it clearly."_

_♪ When no one knows if a wish will come true  
People call it hope ♪_

_"I'd think he'd suddenly come home tomorrow... or maybe not. But at the same time, I want this pain to end just as much." He paused, "But also, I don't want all the things filling in this room to disappear."_

_♪ Even without you, dawn will break  
The separated hands will connect again soon  
One will see the light at the end of a long night  
Even if I'm scared, I can keep on living  
When the sun rises, I'll start walking again  
Look, dawn is nearly breaking  
So I'll be okay ♪_

Maybe something will remain, even if they can never be the same again, even if they go somewhere far away. He only hopes at least the music will remain.

 _♪_ Look, it's coming soon, right there  
Dawn is breaking _♪_

Ashe breaks a sweat, "Thank you so much." He bowed to the audience. Sounds of clapping and tears of joy filled the room.

As Dimitri stood up from his drumset, he sees someone walking away from the crowd.

The band walks to the backstage lounge, "Can we have the next act get ready?"

Dimitri catches up to them, "Claude! I need to go see someone off the station!" He panted. "Sure, but the next act is gonna start soon."

"I'll be right back!"

* * *

"I'll see you in a bit."

He's running towards Byleth he stops to get a breather, "Byleth! Hey, Byleth!" He continued running down the street stairs. "Hey, stop!"

"No."

The blonde stops again in the middle of the stairs, "Huh?! What-"

"Because... If I stop, you're going to talk about breaking up, aren't you?" He continued, "You did great on the drums, seemed delicate as usual though."

Dimitri caught on to him and grabbed his arm, "Hey, listen to me! I... love the violin!" Byleth stops walking, "Playing the drums is fun, but everything into the violin isn't a lie!"

"What the hell... So you _are_ breaking up with me." Dimitri replied, "Yeah. Sorry. And I'm sorry for how much I've hurt you over the years." He paused, "I'll be rooting for you."

"I get it, so you're just gonna let go?" He lets go of Byleth's hand as a response, walking back to the direction he came from. Byleth started to cry, he still couldn't let go. He wanted to walk towards him and apologize, but he was hesitant and reached out his hand to no avail. His sight blurred by the tears.

_"It'll be okay." Ashe said._

He eventually let himself calm down for a bit, "Bye-bye, Dimitri."

* * *

Claude and Dimitri were at the front door of the apartment, "You sure you'll be okay? You've got a place to stay?" Dimitri has packed all his bags again. "Yeah. Thank you for everything."

After the whole concert, the band unfortunately failed the last stage of judging. It wasn't like they thought the band would make it, but they didn't think they'd fail either. All the members were frustrated, but a lot of producers and managers approached them.

Dimitri started showing up at the studio all prepared before anyone else and quitted all his part-time jobs. Claude started seeing him at the college campus more often. After the new year, Claude still played with the band while filling as bassist for another one, playing in quite a few shows.

_"Claude! Here, this is for you." Dimitri offered him his Starbucks coffee. "Uh... Thanks..."_

_"You've been acting all weird lately." Claude said as the 2 walked on the streets of Faerghus Time Square. "Yeah, sure. You're welcome._ "

By spring, Dimitri entered a violin competition, playing on the same stage Byleth did that one day. Somewhere deep down, Claude didn't think he had that kind of intense passion in him. " _Wait... Was he always like this?_ " He thought to himself and got out of his seat. "Sorry. I'm not feeling well, so I'm gonna get home." whispering to Ashe. "Huh?"

* * *

Claude was sitting on a lonely bench surrounded by sakura tress in the night sky. Dimitri sure changed and he ended up imagining who could've been the one to change him. He heard someone shouting his name and looked behind, "Dima?" He ran towards him, "Seriously, you should've told me you'd be there! I noticed you while I was on and I almost said something! Why were you there?" He was blushing.

"Ashe just invited me out of nowhere this morning..." Dimitri continued his ranting, "I was so embarrassed, so embarrassed!"

"But you looked really cool and all..." Claude said. "Well, thanks! How are you feeling?!" He was getting super flustered and couldn't form his words. "Uh, yeah... How did the results go?" Dimitri calmed down a bit and sat beside him. "I placed 4th."

"Congrats?" He didn't know what to say. "It's not actually that great. But... thanks." Dimitri said. He continued, "I ended up breaking up with Byleth, the guy I was in love with." Claude was confused. "You just up and left my place, so I thought..."

"Actually, I ended up apologizing to my parents and asked if they could help me out with some cash." He softly facepalmed. Claude started to connect the dots, "Then you started getting really serious about the violin!"

"That's because... I'd been running away all this time, so I wanted to see just how much I could do."

"And you suddenly started acting all distant around me!" "That's because..."

"And you just kept on changing!" Claude wanted to blame him so much. Dimitri stood up, "Ugh, would you just be quiet for a second?! The reason why I decided to make changes in my life was because..."

"I wanted to become a man worthy of your love!"

Looking at Claude's face, he was speechless. The both of them started blushing and Claude hid his face with his hands sitting down on the grass. Dimitri crouched down for him, "Khalid. Khalid... may I hold you?"' He opened his eyes again to see Dimitri's shaking hand. "Sure."

The other went straight for a full hug. "I love you. Please go out with me."

They stayed like that for a while. "Sorry, I rushed that." Dimitri said. "I'm lame, I don't play fair, and I'm a brat... I may end up hurting you again and Felix might yell at me again... But ever since I heard Ashe's song, I wanted to change."

The last of Khalid's tears fell down his cheek. He continued, "So let me try that again-"

"Okay, I get it. Sure." He smiled at his new boyfriend. "For real?"

"For real."

Ashe's song is like magic. He wanted to give love another try.

"Ah, Dimitri. Let's go home." They both stood up.

He fell in love in Autumn. This is an ordinary love story that took place one ordinary spring.

**Author's Note:**

> I never have written long fics before I hope this is good. I'm thinking about writing a sylvix Bana Fish AU as well, but I need to figure out which character is who lol
> 
> And me: twitter.com/DIMITRINNIT


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